Back in the Saddle

To say it's a trying time in this town is an understatement.  We are still in a massive flood zone...water everywhere and it's looking like it won't be leaving us anytime soon.  I find myself feeling guilty.  Guilty that my house is not flooded.  Guilty that my job is secure.  Guilty that my life gets to basically keep on a going.  Sure I have to boil water just like everyone else and weave my way around this traffic disaster, but those are small fries.  Really small fries.  I feel extremely guilty that while so many of my friends and extended family members' lives are completely torn into bits and pieces, mine is still stitched together without many changes.

That's why I haven't been sharing pictures and thoughts here lately.  It just doesn't feel right with this guilt that I have on my back.  But today, I decided that maybe if seeing some moments or reading a few words could bring a little bit of happy to someone then that could be what I'm supposed to do during this time.  Keep looking for the little things.  Keep finding happy in the everyday.

And I've said it before and I'll say it again, kids and horses are good for the soul.  So that seems like a good place to start.  It's easy to find happy when the smell of horse breath is in the air and the sound of kids laughing is ringing in the ears and the dimpled smiles of little people are visible to the eye.  Even if it's a kiss being pushed off.  Because I guess Easy Rider did not want me to sneak a kiss on his cheek when he was with me on Smokey.  He was not having it.   

Shortly after Easy Rider denied my kiss, I was walking across the yard on a mission to go and help Sister Pister put the horses we had just finished riding away so she could meet with the girls that were coming for some barrel and pole lessons.  But my mission was quickly cut short as I noticed that she had two littles following and copying her every move learning the ropes.  It's at times like that, when I'm crouched in the grass, looking through a lens that I think, "These are the seconds that make up the big stuff."  

My moment in the grass was cut short with Sister Pister yelling at me to get my rear in gear so she could jump on Gunner to head out to the arena.  While the kids and I finished putting tack away, we had a make silly faces contest.  Do you ever wonder where kids learn to make silly faces?  It's like they are born with knowing how to do a fish kissy face and a rockstar pose. 

And later that night, out in the arena with the sun starting to set, Little Man was tearing around trying to do everything in his little legs' power to get.to.the.horses.

I figure it won't be long before he is also in the mix with the pony Chief.  My heart skipped a beat when I saw Firecracker leading her brother around and it makes me wonder...what is a childhood like that doesn't involve horses?  They are such amazing teachers of so many of life's intricacies.

I say with certainty that horses do indeed teach lessons.  Lessons on caring.  Lessons on  loving.   Lessons on when to take the lead and when to follow.  Because I've seen that they have when I watch Sister Pister in action.  Sure, that night she was helping a couple of her friends with some tips for barrel racing and pole bending but there was something bigger going on as well.  It was a seventeen year old girl confident enough in something, something she has worked for her whole life, teaching and helping and giving.  Sharing her love with others.  Sharing her passion.  And it's important, life beat important, to be passionate.

 
So as nerdy and corny as it sounds, I feel like I'm back in the saddle.  Yes, I am still guilty and yes, I feel like I wish I could wipe away the pain from this town and the people I love.  But I know that I need to keep on doing what I do.  And I'm constantly ready to drop everything and help them and laugh with them and cry with them and just be with them at a moment's notice.

And one day we'll all look back at this time of heartbreak in this town as a life changing event, not only for the actual structure of the concrete, wood, streets, paths, bridges, walls, and roofs, but also for the people, the truly amazing and inspiring people who call this home.  I only hope that when we look back, we will realize that it was life changing in a positive way.  It's hard, if not impossible to see that right now, but maybe one day.