Yet Again I do THIS

Does anyone else do this to themselves?  

Oh it's a week and half before Christmas so now is when you should decide to start a ginormous project with pictures.  As in going through the last eight years and doing some sorting and book making.  

Anyone else? 

Which leads me to...
 

Why?  Why do I do this to myself?  

Because now here I am.  Saturday night and I'm sitting in this blue paisley chair with my glasses on and red eyes and an anxious get this done GET THIS DONE feeling.  

Bottom of the ninth.  

Of course.

I've really come a long way in most areas of the bottom of the ninthing it but certain things like pictures and party planning will always remain a wait kind of thing.  

And I've decided it's because it is blastingly (making that word up) overwhelming situation.  It's like the hardest for me.  To decide this picture goes and this picture gets shown and this picture stays.  I have so many pictures.  

My own fault really.  Over documenting probably.  But then as I sit here and scroll through the last eight years plicking (making that word up) out memories, I am flooded with emotion.  It's all here.  

It's all here.  In these pictures of mine.  Every big event.  Most small events.  And more so than the actual memory of what happened, it's the memory of the feeling in where I was at in my life that is grabbing me.  

Feeling behind the picture.  The unseen.  It's there.  It's all there.  

So I'm thankful.  Thankful I over document and bottom of the ninth myself into these blastingly (I like it and I want to use it much) overwhelming Saturday nights.  Just me, myself, and my pictures.
 

And a glass of wine.  I have a glass of wine and tears in my eyes because how can you not when you look back...when I look back and think that one day these pictures of my little sister and I at my thirtieth birthday will be a treasure.  We'll be old and gray and these will bring a twinkle to our eye. 

Sometimes I panic at the thought that if something should ever happen to me all these memories would be stuck without being in the hands of the people who lived them with me.  The very idea which stemmed this bottom of the ninth project to begin with...