The Lawn Mower Incident

Everytime I go to the farm, there is this yellow wire/pole combo thing that stares me in the face.  It's like it taunts me.  Yes, it really does.  A long, long time ago when I was a newly minted five year old, I had a little incident with the lawn mower and that yellow wire/pole combo thing.  First, to get the full effect of exactly what a newly minted five year old mowing lawn looks like, I feel you need to see something. 

That would be me as a newly minted five year old using a riding lawn mower.  Ummm...parents?  I guess there was different rules in the 80's.  Or maybe they just wanted to get as much work out of me as possible as soon as possible.  Or maybe I was driving Momma Debi crazy {I can't imagine} and she just wanted me out of the house.  Any way you slice it, there I am mowing in my rolled up jeans and velcro shoes.  Such a fashionista already.  And, please remember with me that at that time in ND, it was a drought.  Hence, the very ugly brown grass.  I do assure you that the mower was actually running even though it looks like there is nothing to mow.  And, I need you to notice the look of concentration on my face, that will come in to play later on.   

The incident with the wire/pole combo thing didn't happen that day.  No, the incident with the wire/pole combo happened a different day that summer.  The wire/pole combo thing is in the middle of a circle of grass that the circle driveway at the farm goes around.  It sounds complicated, but it's really not.  Here it is now {notice the green, green grass because we are in the opposite of a drought this summer}.  That yellow protector thing has always been there...it's not an add-on.   

So, there I was a newly minted five year old mowing the lawn in a drought and I was really quite proud of myself.  I've always had a tendency to be pretty proud of myself.  Anyways, I was mowing along, concentrating...until...something distracted me. 

The something that distracted me was our neighbor, who I'll call Troy {could be his real name, could be not his real name...you decide}, drove in with a tractor and baler.  I was so proud of my mowing abilities I started waving like a wild woman and smiling and waving and yelling and waving.  I guess I had already acquired my attention issues by then because I got so wrapped up in smiling and waving and yelling and waving that I stopped paying attention to mowing.  

The result of that not paying attention was...I drove the lawn mower up the yellow wire/pole combo thing.  I'll say it again.  I drove the lawn mower up the yellow wire/pole combo thing.    

I know it sounds unbelievable so I'll explain some more.  I must have been heading straight for it and hit it at just the right angle because the lawn mower actually drove up on and balanced on the yellow wire/pole combo thing.  The tiller was on the back of the riding mower and that held the mower in place balanced on the yellow wire/pole combo thing. 

Here's a little recap.  Mowing.  Super proud of myself.  Distraction.  Waving.  Yelling.  Smiling.  Up the yellow wire/pole combo thing.  Mower stuck on it balanced.  All because of the tiller on the back that prevented it from tipping one way or the other. 

I      f.r.e.a.k.e.d      out.  Not because I thought the mower was going to tip or because I thought my life was in danger.  I freaked out because I thought Dad-o would be mad at me.  So, I jumped off the mower while it was still balanced on the yellow wire/pole combo thing.  Back then the mowers would stay going even if there wasn't weight on the seat so the engine stayed running and the mower deck kept running as well.  I jumped off and RAN to the house and hid, crouched in the kitchen by the dishwasher {why I thought that was a good hiding place, I do not know} and screamed. 

Momma Debi came running in the kitchen and was all, "WHAT is wrong?"  And then I was all, "Mower {cry} pole {cry some more} up all the way {cry even more} I'm going to be in trouble {go into complete hysterics}."  And then Momma Debi was all, "Amy, I can't understand you.  What happened?"  And then, before I could start my crying hysterical explanation again, Dad-o came barreling through the door yelling, "Where's Amy?!  Is she ok?  Holy {bad word}!  Where is she?!" 

He wasn't mad.  He was scared.  He was scared because he was working in the shop at the time of the incident and heard Troy making a ruckus and looked out and saw the lawn mower with the mower still RUNNING balanced up on the yellow wire/pole combo thing.  He was scared because he thought I was underneath the balancing lawn mower. 

So, back to the kitchen scene.  Momma Debi, ever the calm force, pointed to me in crying hysterics by the dishwasher and Dad-o was all, "Thank God you are ok!  I't's fine.  I'll get the lawn mower down.  Really, calm down."  Whew.

He took me outside and he got the mower down off the pole.  I don't really remember how, he just did it.  And, then, here's the best part.  The best part is he put me right back on that mower and said, "There you go, you can keep mowing.  Just watch where you are going."

Just watch where you are going?  That's all I got?    

I guess there was no room for fear so I did it.  I kept mowing.  I often think of that situation and it's kind of like getting back on a horse after it bucks you off.  You can either be scared of the horse forever or you can decide to just keep on riding.  Dad-o apparently didn't want me to be scared of lawn mowers {maybe because that would be an odd fear}, so he plopped me right back on it and had me keep mowing.  Life lesson #254.  

Here's a little remnant of the incident that is still on the pole today.  Everytime I see it, I'm always reminded of driving the lawn mower up it.  Not many people can say they have done that.  It's crossed off my bucket list.