So it's been a crazy week or so around these parts as I'm sure it has been for most. Momma Debi and Dad-o hosted Thanksgiving this year and I managed to not end up with stitches so that's a plus. Although, when the first guests arrived, I was carrying a level, a hammer, and some nails around. Yes, I am that person. And, my cousin Lacie said, "Of course you would have a level right now Amy." And, then I said, "Yes, that's me." We had a perfect day yesterday. A day of family, feeling grateful, remembering, laughing, playing Yahtzee {just so it's stated publicly...Sister Pister took down the self proclaimed "king" of Yahtzee...you know who you are}, and of course eating. One must stuff their face until they feel as if they are going to pop. It's important to do that.
Then, this morning, at 2:15 AM to be exact, I rolled out of bed, brushed my teeth, patted down the hair, applied deodorant, put on a mish mash of clothes, and went Black Friday shopping with my friend Karen and her mom.
I have never done the true Black Friday experience before and I feel it deserves a list of high points.
1. Walmart has not been a place I've gone for over a year because it makes me feel all crazy inside. But, I went there. On Black Friday. When we pulled up, we landed upon first row parking and Karen looked over at me and proclaimed, "See Amy, the Walmart gods want you back, they really want you back...look at this spot."
2. There was a line in Target this morning at approximately 4 AM that would have made your grandma cry. So, I strolled along side all of those people standing in line until I saw a person I thought needed a little pick me up. I walked over to his cart, patted down his electronic piano that he had perched ever so carefully, and told him, "Good choice. Good choice" and proceeded to just walk away all the while having a straight face.
3. While at Sears, Karen's checkout lady said she was out of change so Karen told her, "Well, I have some change." Checkout lady said, "How much do you have?" And, then Karen pulled out a dollar from her pocket and proceeded to loudly tell her, "One dollar. I have one dollar. ONE DOLLAR! You need my one dollar?!" Checkout lady was not impressed. Karen's mom and I laughed though, along with the fifteen people standing there.
4. Right before the one dollar debacle, Karen and I had made friends with an elderly gentleman in the shoe department by telling him the shoes he was trying on made him look fifteen pounds lighter and ten years younger. Then, while I was waiting for Karen to checkout, I propped myself against a tool box. Pretty soon, previously mentioned elderly gentleman was propped up along side of me and he looked at me as serious as pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving and said, "My credit card was declined. Can I borrow some money from you?" I slammed my hand down on the tool box and yelled, "I will NOT borrow you money until after we have made out!" Now, this caused a scene. People were laughing, I was standing there all serious like, and the elderly gentleman just shook his head and smiled and then walked away. Good thing I noticed the receipt in his hand. No one gets anything by me.
5. While checking out at Target, Karen, her mom, and I were all at separate registers and whenever we each hit the one hundo mark we yelled across to each other, "I hit one hundo!! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!!" and proceeded to fist pump and donkey kick until we had the whole lot staring at us.
6. Random strangers received hugs and "Hey! Hey! HEYY!! in their face. Ninety two percent of them loved it. And, we passed out gum to people too. Just call us good will ambassadors.
7. Lots of coffee was needed. Lots indeed.
8. A Perkins pit stop will make your heart happy.
9. It is not appropriate to be part of the crazy early morning, non showered shoppers and then stay through to round two of the showered shoppers in the afternoon. Not appropriate at all. Karen and I dropped her mom off and went back at it. By 2 o'clock in the afternoon, we looked like we had been run over and everyone else out was looking all fresh.
10. I locked myself out of my house.
11. We then had to drive to meet Momma Debi and Dad-o. Good thing they are so used to my shenanigans.
12. I had four house keys made at Wal-mart after that. I plan to disperse them around so it won't happen to me again. Maybe you want to keep one at your house?
13. The salesman at Tradehome shoes told us that he really wanted to be able to call the cops just one time during a Black Friday. I then told him that I was willing to tackle a stranger to make it happen for him.
14. Good deals were found and Christmas presents were bought and memories were made. I'll be back at it next year.
15. To end this list, I feel you need to actually see the loveliness of Karen and I by the end of the day. Notice the great quality of the pictures...I was too tired to care. And, we look a bit like hobos with our mish mash of clothing choices. Remember, we were out looking like this waaaayy after the time it's appropriate. We were among the showered.
Black Friday...totally fun.
No comments:
Post a Comment